Have you ever realised you loved something more than everything else only when it went away? Of course you did. We all did.
It occured to me too late. I realised she was the one when she had already left. I couldn’t explain why I realised it too late. Maybe I was just so dumb to see through her eyes. Now it’s like four years of hope and wonder which just disapeared. Now it’s just like I’ve been always wrong.
My big mistake? I was so naive. I thought everything was right, that she was right, and so was I. But we were not. I’ve never called it “Love”. To me “love” was just an absurd concept that everybody desperatly hopes to come true. To me it was just an illusion, something too utopist to be real. I felt something, something unusual, true and so powerfull. But I rathered not call it “love”. Of course I knew she was the most important for me, of course I wanted her to be near to me every seconds of every minutes of our life. I thought we were happy together, that all that nights past together were just full of something true, something as simple as strong. But now I can’t even say if her eyes ever told me the truth. She went away, without a word. But not from one day to the next. It was more like a little wound opening slowly on my heart, she left me slowly, and I couldn’t do anything. I thought we will die together, I swear.
The fact is that we met each other in a very sad moment of our life. We both thought that we had to leave it, but then we met each other. She was like an unexpected light inside the darkness, and I’ve always thought she felt the same for me.
I have no more hope anymore. I don’t feel sad or something like that. I juste feel alone.
And now, a new fear is killing me: Die alone. I will die alone, for sure.
I miss you, little fairy.
Your little prince.
